From the Home Place

November 22, 2025

In Genesis 1 we read that Adam was alone in the garden of Eden, so God made a “helper” “suitable” for him. The word “suitable” literally means, “that which is opposite, contrary to.” (Young’s Bible Dictionary) WOW! Why would God give Adam someone who is so opposite, even contrary to him???

To answer this question, one has to look up the word “contrary.” It means, “in conflict with.” WHAT?That answer just created another question: Why would God give Adam a “helper” who will be in “conflict with” him? Well, let’s back up just a tad, perhaps our all-knowing God knew that Adam and Eve would eat the forbidden fruit and would then enter into conflict – read Genesis 3:12-13 – the blame game started!

Or perhaps our all-knowing God knows that “conflict” is the best way to get humans to make needed changes. Think about it, while talking with Adam, God speaks of the earth, “In toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. Both thorns and thistles it shall grow for you.” Immediately after sinning man is in “conflict” with nature. From that moment on man has battled floods, fires, earthquakes, volcanos, tornados and hurricanes – he is constantly in conflict with nature. However, that conflict has caused man to build stronger buildings, flood walls and to learn how to keep a fire perimeter around his buildings.

We can take this “conflict” one step further: When a person becomes a Christ-follower, the Bible shows us that there is a constant conflict between my “flesh” and the Holy Spirit. My flesh wants what it wants, and the Holy Spirit wants something better for me. My flesh wants to be independent, and the Holy Spirit wants me to be dependent. Yet, because of the conflict, when my flesh yields to the Holy Spirit, harmony comes upon the scene and joy abounds!

Now back to God giving Eve to Adam to be in “conflict” with him. As a husband of 53+ years, I can tell you that Miss Deb and I most often disagree about what to do and how to do it. I think the key is in understanding that God created them “male and female.” Two absolute opposites apart from God’s intervention. By God’s amazing grace, male and female can learn to live in harmony and joy!

If a male and female are drawn together just because of their physical pleasures, such a relationship is doomed. And then there is the attempt to make home improvements together. There is not enough time nor space to tackle that topic, other than to say that there will be conflict. Male and female will approach and fulfill tasks from two different spheres of the brain, and personal preference. Personal opinions seem to be the primary impetus of most “conflict.” Yet, as male and female we were created to need each other.

I must agree, without Miss Deb in my life I probably would not understand the compassionate, loving, caring, nurturing side of God’s nature. Without someone helping me see the opposite side of things, my life, and my Christian experience, would have been extremely one-sided; and very boring.

In 2 Corinthians 6:14 we read, “Do not be bound together with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness?” Remember, in the very beginning the earth was covered with darkness. God’s first creative action was to create light, and then He separated the light from the darkness – the two never were intended to go together. Why do Christians keep trying to prove this theory wrong by choosing unbelievers for marriage partners?

As a friend says, “Who would have ever thunk it?” God created the perfect “conflict” partner for each of us as male and female. Conflict = Change; Change = Christlikeness; Christlikeness = Harmony in the home! You see, God does know what He is doing!

Praising God for a conflict partner with you, Neal

P.S. We will continue discussing this tomorrow.